Cooking With Spice
by silverwolf-fox
Summary: ONESHOT! Cobra wouldn't have guessed that a shared interest with the silver haired barmaid would lead to late night cooking within the guild's kitchen. It's not often he finds someone who likes to eat poison as much as he does Cobra/Mirajane


**I can't remember where I got the idea for a Cobra/Mirajane, but here it is. I don't focus on interconnecting my oneshots, but if you've read Sound of a Dream (my Cobra/Kinana), then you know that I like the idea of Cobra becoming deaf after his fight with Natsu (sorry, Erik!), and that idea continues on in this oneshot.**

 **Enjoy! Reviews are love!**

"Spoken"

 _Cobra's thoughts_

' _Other's thoughts'_

' _ **Written'**_

" **Signed"**

* * *

No matter how long he stared, the words on the note in his hand didn't change. A lone violet eye scanned the rowdy crowd around him, trying to determine where it came from. At his usual seat at the far end of the bar, body turned towards the the open guild hall, it shouldn't have been possible for someone to have left it on the counter beside him.

That was the whole point of his chosen seat. It was disgustingly embarrassing how word got out about his disability. One of the dumb fairies actually noticed him signing with Cubellios and Macbeth and from there it had spread like wildfire. Part of him was grateful, because it meant he could deactivate his Soul Reading magic for some peace, though he also had to stick to his spot in the corner or else risk being hit by whatever mug, table, or person happened to be thrown in his direction that day.

The scent of his best friend caught his attention just before she tapped him on the shoulder. Cobra turned to see Cubellios leaning against the bar. The purple haired girl nodded her head at the scrap of paper held between his fingers.

" **What is that?"** she signed. Instead of responding, Cobra handed the note to her and let her read the instructions telling him to be in the guild kitchen after closing. Cubellios' face scrunched, wrinkling her nose in disbelief. " **Someone wants to meet you tonight?"**

"Don't act so surprised," he snapped, snatching the note from her. Though he felt mildly offended, Cobra knew his best friend was just teasing him, even though her confusion was well founded. Despite spending more and more time within the Fairy Tail guild hall, he didn't really talk to anybody except Cubellios and Midnight, when the latter was actually around.

" **Are you going to go?"** the former-snake asked, tilting her head in interest as she used to do. Cobra rested an elbow against the bar to prop up his head and destroyed the paper with his acidic poison. Heaving a sigh, his violet eye glanced at her before going back to observe the crazed actions of the fairies.

" **Who knows."**

~I~

It was an hour or so after closing that Cobra found himself wandering around the street outside of Fairy Tail. If anyone was to ask, he'd say that it was on his way back home which would be a straight up lie. Not only did he not have a permanent residence in Magnolia, but he was currently staying with Cubellios, who he had just left after walking her home once her shift at the guild was finished.

He went years without her, worrying about her. No way was he going to go through that again just because she thinks it's safe to walk around late at night by herself. Anxiously tapping his fingers against his thigh, Cobra made a mental note to teach Cubellios some poison magic.

Realizing that standing in the middle of the road in a heavy trench coat in the middle of the night made him look like a creep with nefarious plans, Cobra decided to get this over with and headed to the guild. Testing the door revealed it to still be unlocked, so the Poison Dragonslayer pushed it open and stepped inside. It was odd for the guild to be so silent, usually hectic with fiddles, drums, and brass. Kicking the door closed behind him, he immediately noticed that all the lights were off except for the one coming from the kitchen.

There was a clash of voices within his mind that could be nothing except the multitude of souls contained within Fairy Tail's resident she-devil. Harsh and loud, he immediately put a hold on his magic and fell back into peaceful quiet. Cobra stripped off his heavy coat and laid it on the bar counter, leaving himself in a plain black button up and burgundy pants, while walking around to the entryway.

Heat spilled from the kitchen, and the reptilian side of Cobra wanted to purr from the comforting warmth as well as from the delicious scents that now surrounded him.

The kitchen was large and mostly made of shiny steel which, with a flash of amusement, Cobra noticed had a few bites taken out of it in a few places. The counters were cluttered with various cooking implements: cutting boards and knives, steaming skillets, boiling pots, and more food than a Dragonslayer could eat in an entire day.

"Anyone here?" he called out, hands deep in his pockets. At his voice, a head of silver hair popped out from across the room where the food storeroom was. While it wasn't a surprise to see Mirajane Strauss busy cooking in the guildhall, it was a surprise for her to invite him here. Made him glad that he had deactivated his Soul Listening, because trying to make sense of all the demonic souls within her was near impossible and only ever served to give him migraines.

When she saw him, Mira's eyes brightened and she held up a finger to tell him to wait a moment. The beautiful mage dashed over to one of the skillets simmering on one of the many stove tops, grabbing a spoon on the way to scoop up a taste of the dish, and bringing it to the slayer. Her pale hand cupped underneath it to avoid any spills, and she held it expectantly in front of Cobra's mouth.

Without subjecting himself to a torrent of psychotic she-devils' thoughts, he was left raising a brow in question, but Mira just smirked and quirked her own in response. His nose approved, and it wasn't as if she could poison him, so Cobra opened his mouth and let the sweet woman feed him.

Like anything created by her, spicy flavor sparked across his tongue, but what made him moan was the underlying sweet taste of Taxus Baccata. Mirajane grinned, blue eyes sparkling, and pulled the spoon away to drop it on the metal counter. Heading to another corner of the room, she picked up a pad of notepaper and an ink pen.

' _ **A shepherd's pie with a twist,'**_ she wrote.

"English yew," Cobra said, using the common name for the toxic plant he tasted. While delicious, he was still confused. "So why am I here?" Excitement lit up her expression. Putting down the pen and paper, Mira straightened herself in front of him. Closing her eyes while taking a deep breath, her hands were held up before her.

" **I like...poison. You like poison. We...cook...together."** Her signing was slow, simple, and she had to pause every few signs to think about the next action, but Cobra was caught off guard that she even knew some of the silent language.

" **When did you start learning sign language?"** The furrowed brow told him that Mira didn't catch what he had asked so Cobra repeated the signs, slowly, and spoke while he did so.

" **I…"** Mira paused and tried one of the new signs, " **learn…..from K-I-N-A-N-A."** Cobra couldn't help the corner of his lip curling up, admiration for her effort growing with every sign, and also because he loved knowing that Cubellios was happy and getting along with others.

A hand curled around his elbow and pulled him over to a pot that was left simmering. Mira lifted the top and stirred the inside with the ladle that was hooked over the side. Setting it down, her blue eyes met his violet.

" **Try this,"** she ordered. Cobra had trouble figuring out how he'd become her personal taste tester, but nonetheless sniffed the oddly colored green and purple soup, and had a taste. Then another to sift through the different flavors.

"I'm guessing aconite leaves and wild mandrake root," he started, taking another sip, "on top of a beer and green pepper base. Garlic and onion?" The silver haired barmaid looked on in utter shock, slowly nodding. Most people wouldn't guess it and he wasn't generally one to admit it, but there was a certain joy Cobra found in cooking. Rolling his sleeves up to the elbows, he smirked and took it upon himself to explore the kitchen.

As she did with everything, Mira went above and beyond any expectations. Including the poison laced dishes she had cooking, she showed him a hidden shelf in the storage room where she kept all of her personal ingredients. Several jars of varying leaves and roots, as well as vials full of toxins extracted from monsters, all labeled with a piece of tape and black marker. Cobra paused when he saw a vial of black Manticore venom. _Not exactly easy to come by._ A quick sniff deemed it more bitter than he was in the mood for.

All in all, Cobra was very impressed with the variety. He usually had to make due with whatever toxic plants he was able to find while Crime Sorciére was camping, but they could never provide the same strength as the old days when he had Cubellios around to breathe a gourmet meal for him. Picking out a few choice ingredients, including a rare, dark gray basilisk venom, they returned to the kitchen to outdo each other in a more delicious battle than the guild normally hosted.

The two worked surprisingly well together, seamlessly moving about as they chopped ingredients and used the toxic spices that only they could enjoy. Many times during the night, Mirajane would appear at his side with something for him to taste test, and he, in turn, would feed her his own devilish concoction.

"Don't you use these to cook for the fairies?" he asked, setting his pot to a simmer so he could turn to see her response.

" **This is a second S-E-T for me. I keep them L-O-C-K-E-D in A-N-O-T-H-E-R room,"** Mira answered, her signing becoming more confident with her increased frequency of use, spelling the words she didn't know. With the clock striking 3am and the counters covered in poisoned-food filled tupperware, they both knew that the night would have to end soon. Cobra was surprised by how fast the last few hours passed by. It was rare for him to have this much fun with anyone that wasn't Cubellios or Macbeth.

While her last experiment, brownies filled with Actaea Pachypoda, otherwise known as White Baneberry, cooked in the oven, the she-devil started a heavy duty cleaning of all the used pots and pans. Even without a big sweet tooth, those brownies would be heavenly. Toxins with a similar sedative effect on the cardiac muscle had a tendency to relax the Poison Dragonslayer, though his magic kept it from affecting him to the point of causing cardiac arrest.

An odd scent swirled around him as Mira walked passed in her quest of cleanliness. Curious, Cobra prepared himself and started listening in on her souls. However, it seemed he caught them in the midst of a fascinating discussion.

' _Probably as good as he would taste.'_

' _Devour him!'_

' _Claim his soul as your own!'_

' _Mine. Mine. MINE!'_

The silver haired beauty rubbed the side of her temple with her right hand, while the other propped a sparkling pot against her hip. Obviously Cobra wasn't the only one getting a headache from the many voices shouting inside both of their minds.

Returning himself to silence, he watched her put away the pot, and when Mira walked back past him, Cobra smoothly twisted her around until he was pressing her up against the counter, arms entrapping her on either side. Leaning close until she could only look at his eye, purple fumes smoking out from his mouth.

"So you wanted a taste?" he teased. Mira licked her lips and breathed in the poison gas, the spicy taste tingling on her tongue. It was like a warm mist and it tasted better than anything they'd cooked. She could sense the potency granted by the Poison Dragonslayer magic.

The smirk Cobra wore made her want to punch him. And kiss him. She unconsciously moved her face closer, blue eyes half-lidded. He matched her movement, getting just close enough that their lips almost touched, then reached a hand behind her. When he pulled back, he had a red pepper slice between his fingers. Cobra took a bite of the pepper he had earlier baked in oil with jack-in-the-pulpit root, and his cocky grin widened.

He left her breathing heavily and leaning against the counter as he started to walk away. Raising a hand, he looked over his shoulder.

"Invite me again the next time you want some late night tasting," Cobra said. Imagining her expression, torn between lust and fury, he began to laugh at the uniquely seductive reaction to his taunt. However, the Poison Dragonslayer didn't pause, exiting the kitchen and grabbing his earlier discarded coat. Sliding the heavy fabric on, the maroon haired mage left the guild hall, though not before hearing a yell and crashing cookware.

There was no doubt the She-Demon would make him regret his teasing, but it would be worth it. Especially if she decided to take him up on his offer. He'd happily give her something more than a cloud of poisonous mist to suck down.

* * *

 **Just a little idea I had. It'd be a cute bonding experience for Cobra and Mirajane, I think.**

 **I'm no poison master, but from what I looked up, all the plants I mentioned actually are poisonous. I'd recommend not eating them, though, haha.**


End file.
